Monday, March 30, 2009

Plain Sick

Well I think I may have caught the flu. I felt like dying last night. Then this morning I tried to convince myself that it could be much worse. I am still deciding if I am just Plain Sick or very very Sick!

The difference between being just plain sick and being very very sick:

Plain Sick: You disconnect your phone and hide when the doorbell rings in fear that it's probably your mother and she wants to "take care of her wittle baby." And the thought makes you more sick.

Very Very Sick: As you lay on the floor curled in a fetal position next to the toilet waiting for the next wave of violent gagging and vomiting, all you can think of is how much you want your mommy to take care of her wittle baby.

Plain Sick: You wake up and put on an old comfy pair of sweat pants and throw your hair into a twisty. Your somewhat happy because having a "Sick Day" means you have an excuse to be lazy.

Very Very Sick: You wake up and realize that wearing the same clothes for 3 days isn't that bad. It doesn't really matter anyhow, because your too weak to care and your going back to bed.

Plain Sick: You carefully measure out doses of cough medicine to yourself and the sick kids.

Very Very Sick: You tell the kids to measure their own medicine and you yourself drink it straight from the bottle. Besides you feel an overdose will do everyone some good.

Plain Sick: Although your feeling under the weather, you make the sick kiddos some chicken noodle soup and toast. Then you cuddle together and watch a good movie.

Very Very Sick: Your sick kiddos moan and complain for something to eat and you tell them that there should be some uncooked pasta in the back of the pantry that they can chew on. Oh and forget about the cuddling, your worried that you just might die and you don't want the kids around to see it happen.

Plain Sick: When you hear one of the kiddos yell out that someone just puked on the floor, you run to get the mini steam clean machine and immediately clean it up.

Very Very Sick: After one of the kiddos puke, you tell them to cover it with a few paper towels. You will clean it up in a few days. Then you threaten the rest of the children telling them that if they puke on the floor, then they will have to eat it. (your desperate!)

Plain Sick: You patiently sit holding the puke bucket while the sick kiddo pukes and then you feed them small spoonfuls of ice chips while rubbing their back.

Very Very Sick: The Motto: "All for one and one for all" becomes your new motto.

Plain Sick: Your bed becomes the family bed and everyone piles in for some TLC.

Very Very Sick: You love your children, but you, A: Don't want to be touched. B: Don't want to be looked at. C: Don't want to talk. D: You remind them of your new Motto. (See above)

Plain Sick: After getting out of bed to aid one of the sick kiddos for the 100th time, you still manage a semi smile and a comforting back rub.

Very Very Sick: You hear them calling your name and you imagine the sight you will be forced to confront, but you manage to tune them out because even though you love your kids, your now questioning yourself for wanting to become a mother. For a minute or so, you wonder if anyone would be willing to adopt a handful of half grown/ sick kids. Then you click your heels together several times repeating the words, "There is no place like home, there is no place like home." as you imagine that your 10 years old, back at home and your no longer the mommy!